Sick of your packages getting stolen? Here's a great way to stop thieves! It's a glitter bomb disguised as a package. It doesn't stop there, after the blast of glitter your thief is greeted with not one but five spritzes of fart spray! The best part of this theft deterrent are the cameras so you can see your thief's reaction. People are lame. Don't steal other people's sh*t.
On a related note, if anyone can help me to construct a dog poop package, I'd be grateful.